Oh hey y’all! It’s me, Cassie! You know the girl who has been MIA from this blog for the past 5 months. Either way, I am back! But not only am I back, I am writing this post from my hotel room all the way in Switzerland!! Far from home, across the world, and I happened to look back at my blog today and read my last post (not the outfits, the expectations post) and inspired myself to write a post. Honestly, since I got here in Switzerland, I have had a lot on my mind and a blog post has been brewing in my head. A post about what I have been going through, where I am at in life currently, and just what I have learned. Because let me tell y’all, a lot has changed since May. A lot has changed in my life in general since the beginning of the year. At the beginning of the year I felt the Lord telling me how 2018 was going to be a Challenging year. Maybe challenging is not the best word to describe it. More like a year that I was really going to have to lean on the Lord and trust Him in some of life’s challenging moments. On October 7th, 2018 I can confirm that has been pretty darn accurate. I plan on sharing these things and my struggles, because once again if sharing my life can help or encourage just one person, then this blog is all worth it. Mission accomplished.
One big thing I want to share briefly is that I am now in a relationship!!! I got a boyfrand y’all!!!
Finally. About. Dang. Time.
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All joking aside, I am now in a relationship. And to be honest, a big reason why I have been so absent from my blog is because of that. Rest assured, I have been writing, just to a different audience. The story of how my boyfriend and I met, and then how our relationship began is a crazy one. That alone could be 5 different blog posts, and I do intend on sharing it; however, I have been waiting. Waiting for the right time to share, waiting to receive discernment from the Lord, and waiting to see where this relationship was headed. I have been very protective of my relationship to a certain extent, and it is something I wanted to wait on before opening up and sharing aspects of it.
So with that being said, lately I have been experiencing a Season of Transition. A lot of transition and changes have been occurring. As I mentioned earlier, my relationship has been a big one. I went from being single for 2 years to a committed relationship. Y’all, let me tell you, it was difficult for me. To be transparent with you, I didn’t realize how difficult that transition was going to be.
Why was it so difficult you might ask? A variety of reasons. The first was the circumstances of how my boyfriend and I’s relationship began. The second was past relationship issues that resurfaced in this new one. And, lastly my own lovely characteristics that I possess (stubbornness, a perfectionist) crept in.
It has been a while since I have been in a relationship and I have been figuring out how this works again. Because yes, believe it or not, there was a point in my Season of Singleness where I started to forget what it was like to have someone there. I forgot what it was like to have such a close bond with a best friend who you loved that wasn’t just your girlfriend. I have also been putting way too much pressure on my relationship and making sure we do everything perfectly and in the right timing. In case you were wondering, totally not possible.
Are you with me still? So with all this said, and back to me being in Switzerland. This trip has been totally different than my trip I took to Italy last year. It is so crazy actually to compare the two and where I was at in my life a year ago and where I am today. More than anything it just shows the different season I am in and guess what?
IT’S PERFECTLY OKAY!
I am more so saying this for myself than you all. Am I in a new relationship? Yes. Is my life different now? Yes. But guess what? That is life, and that is okay. Change is inevitable, healthy, and normal. If you are not going through changes, you are not growing, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, and potentially experiencing your full potential. And this is coming from a girl who hates change and struggles with it.
I put this pressure on myself to never change when I got in a relationship and always be this bad ass self-empowered woman who did not need no man! And while yes, I absolutely do not need a man to live my best life, I have wanted a best friend, a companion to serve the Lord with and do life with. And as a result, things are going to change. They are supposed to change. Because things are different now. At the end of the day life constantly changes. We go through different seasons. Some are harder than others, some are unforgettable, but one thing has remained the same throughout all mine. The Lord has been faithful. He has been there for me the entire time. Through my tears, loneliness, self-doubting, and anxious moments. And no matter what, He will remain there. As seasons continue to change, as my life continues to change, the Lord has always got my back and will always be there. That is one thing that will never change.